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1. A 15-year-old South African girl was taken to an area hospital with all the signs of being in labor, even though she claimed she could not be pregnant. Upon examination, however, doctors could not find a #vagina. It was quickly discovered she had a birth defect called Mullerian agenesis, and just did not have a vagina. So how on earth could she be #pregnant…. you ask…. Further checks of her records indicated she was at the hospital 278 days earlier after suffering a stab wound in the abdomen. She told doctors she was performing a #sex act on her new lover when her old lover caught them in the act and began stabbing them. #Doctors determined the pregnancy was caused when sperm came in contact with the knife being used before it was thrust into the girl’s abdomen. Ooooo-kayyyyy.
2. An article published in 1874 told the story of Dr. LeGrand Capers, a highly reputable physician at the time. Capers wrote of how he was on the #battlefield during the Civil War in Mississippi when a soldier was struck by a bullet in his testicles, and seconds later, a young, nearby girl screamed in pain. While Capers was treating the wounded soldier, the girl’s mother ran out and pleaded for the doctor to come to the aid of her daughter. He complied. He discovered that a mini ball – that’s what they called round bullets back then – had penetrated her abdominal cavity. He treated her as best he could and she soon began to recover. Over the course of the next few months, it was obvious she was pregnant, although she swore repeatedly that that was impossible. Finally, the doctor said, she delivered an 8-pound baby boy. Upon examination, Dr. Capers found that her #hymen was intact. A few weeks later, the family became concerned that the newborn’s testicles were swollen. The doctor examined him and did a quick operation and, to his astonishment, found a mini ball in his scrotum. Dr. Capers then remember he had treated a young soldier for a mini ball passing through his testicles many months ago just before treating the young girl. That same mini ball, he concluded, must have passed through the soldier’s testicles and, with particles of semen, found its way into the woman’s abdomen and impregnated her. He explained the story to the family and they urged the doctor to set up a meeting with him. A short time after the doctor introduced the girl and her family to the soldier, the two were married and later produced two more children in a more conventional way. It was a happily ever after moment…. But we now must confess that the story I just told you… is a complete lie. Now, before you start shooting those colorful four-letter words our way, let me explain. What IS true is that the good Dr. Capers actually concocted this incredible story and anonymously submitted it to the American Medical Weekly. He did this because so many other outrageous stories were being created from the Civil War, he wanted to get in on the ridiculous tales himself. So, he submitted it to the noted medical journal, certain that its anonymous submission would not tarnish his reputation. But as it turns out, the editor of the publication recognized Capers’ distinctive handwriting from previous submissions and boldly attached the good doctor’s name to the story as its author, thus shooting down his valuable reputation.
3. A 92-year-old #Chinese woman delivered a baby she had been carrying inside of her for 60 years. Yeah, this one’s true. Seems that Huang Yijun got pregnant when she was in her early 30s and the fetus died after some months. But she did not have enough money to have it removed and there were no other options. So she carried it with her into her 90s. When she went to the hospital complaining of stomach pain, doctors discovered the now-mummified baby inside her and were able to remove it.
4. If you like eating calamari…. You.. might.. not .. now. A 63-year-old South Korean woman became “pregnant” inside her mouth after eating calamari. She told doctors – yes, medical people were most certainly involved – that she was dining on a portion of cooked whole squid when she experienced a terrible, sharp pain in her mouth. An examination revealed there were baby cephalopods – 12 in all — attached to several areas of her mouth. The small pods were covered with a cement-like material that made them stick like glue to those areas. Inside these pods were an ejaculatory element that would forcefully, and painfully for the women, expel squid sperm. After hospitalization, doctors removed 12 baby cephalopods from her gums, tongue and cheek. We have no idea how much this traumatized her, although we’re pretty sure it did.
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